"En ma fin git mon commencement."

Mary Queen of Scots

PART ONE - Monkey sees but will he do?

What a joke 'normal Western' living is. Honestly, it's one of the most crazy scenarios on this planet and the sort of thing that only a human being could conceive of and be content with. 100 days on the road have taught me many things, but (surprisingly) none so much as the oddity of re establishing myself into society. Following are some of the oddities that have followed my homecoming - I had no idea that I'd be actually writing about them. I'd guessed it would take about a week to settle in again, but now I'm thinking it may take longer than a few months.

New Habits Die Hard:

Nearly every old habit I had in relation to operating in society has been broken. I now have the chance to create them again. A wisdom has been endowed upon me during the trip, and that is that I have slowly wiped the habit slate clean and now have an unprecedented personal opportunity. As I start re establishing habits, I question their validity and worth. I have the chance, the choice, the perspective and the power to decide whether or not to let these habits take root again. You absolutely would not believe the mental clarity this provides in 'checking' your life and your position in society.

Keys and the Wallet :

I had a saying that I used to use whenever I went anywhere "Wallet and keys are all I need" and I'd pat my pockets to check I had these two items. Then I'd go on my merry way knowing that whatever I encountered I'd be able to make it home. I've been forgetting my keys and/or wallet for days. They're still important, but not in the same sense. I've developed something stronger and more secure - I know I can get by (very comfortably and easily) without keys or wallet, or indeed anything but simply myself. This is more a result of self assurance than a knowledge about the availability of resources. What a priceless yet unexpected reward.

Home Every Night:

After about a fortnight at home I got the feeling that I should be moving on. This happened in the morning at about 7:40. I'd been in this spot too long and there were places to go. I was coming to the same home location every night and I got the feeling that I wasn't making progress, and that the surroundings were far too familiar. This was very, very weird. There was a perceived need to move on, but no want to.

Excesses and Too Many Options:

There have been a few emails circulated over the years that have highlighted the luxury of most of Western society. One that springs to mind is the National Friendship Week one which, among other things, says that if we "have spare change lying somewhere in the house we are amongst the wealthiest 8% of the world's population". I'm assuming that because you own a computer and are reading this that you'd be in that 8%. (2 billion people can't read by the way.) With wealth comes the luxury to choose. The amount of choice we have is mind boggling. From toothpaste flavours, to tyre treads, to capsicum colours. Most of these things aren't essential items needed in order to survive. Still, we have the opportunity of owning these items and choosing the desired features of the item. What has been most noticeable upon my return is the amount of time and emotional effort we waste making our selection of things we don't really need. There are more worthy directions to channel these resources towards.

Crowds and the Dentist:

No matter how well ventilated a shopping centre is, it is still stuffy. I had a dentist appointment less than 48 hours after I returned (good timing hey!) and I had to walk through a shopping centre to get to it. I was almost holding my breath. The smell was distinctly chemical orientated/plastic and every object I looked at was hard and geometric. Crowds move in patterns, but they are not personal or genuinely friendly. It's easy to be lonely amongst several hundred people. I go to a great dentist, but I'll never get used to a bright light shining in my eyes and a few hands and metal tools scratching around in my mouth. What an invasion. What an uncomfortable experience. It's almost an out of body experience when you think about these things as you are actually doing them.

Lines:

Who was the fool who first stood behind someone in order to get something? Which Neanderthal or Cro Magnon is responsible? Do they realise what they started? There are no lines on the trail. I tell a lie - power lines, train lines and road markings are there, but you don't have to wait for them. I only waited in a people line on the trail when on a city road or in a town shopping centre. Because this was rare I had no feeling of frustration with lines. Now I'm back in Brisbane it's a whole different story - I'm in a line daily if not hourly (no You Am I pun intended). I even wait in lines in the house I live in! Although I see the logic in lines they are a self imposed limp on humanity's time efficiency. I'd like to boycott (a nice eponymous word for you) lines by not getting in any. For some reason I think I will have little choice in this matter as I drive a car in traffic, live with more than one other person, work with 30 children who move between locations and I buy food from supermarkets who never have all of their checkouts manned at any one time. This last line maker has baffled me for years.

Fuel:

I'm not at the point at which I herald the bicycle as the ultimate form of transport, but it does come close. (Compared to the average student car it comes amusingly close.) The bicycle is very economic - cheap to purchase and maintain, can carry a load, easy to find a parking space, covers the most formidable sets of stairs, enables you to take crafty short cuts, and emits no pollution. And, of course, they require no fuel. Banana fuel maybe, but no fossil fuel at all to keep it moving. Ahh - fuel/petrol/gas/car drink - the worry of licensed folk across the nation, and a constant source of public banter towards the government. Fuel prices in NSW and Victoria peaked at a healthy$1.08/L where I rode (healthy as you really think about justifying your driving at that price), but up in QLD it was hovering around 80c/L. Once I got back into driving my car I had to deal with fuel again. I hadn't missed it at all.

There's plenty more to consider. Re positioning relationships; justifying my new perspectives in a populated environment; finding nature's art works amongst urban sprawl; considering the value of my material possessions; and keeping my bike out of retirement are but a few.

As an ever adaptable human being life will go on - but nothing like what it was before.   I ponder on.

[What follows is one of the very few entries which is not a first draft. I started jotting notes for this entry as far back as Sydney I think. For some reason I did not attach a date to the notes, thus there is no date attached to this page. I've been mulling over it for some time since I arrived back. '3760km later' is all you really need to know.]

PART TWO - "Reflections like in a mirror star; so long from 'A' now have I really come this far?"

The scope and distance of the trip has been significant : 3779km covered, 100 days of travel, 250+hours of riding, 4 state borders crossed, through 23 national parks, over 3 million 8 thousand wheel revolutions and covering 10.6% of the circumference of the planet Earth. Others have gone further, faster and for longer, but I wasn't going on their adventure - I was going on mine. I have my own memories, my own lessons, my own development and my own perspectives attributed to the journey I undertook. You, the reader, were a part of the journey, so you might claim ownership to them also.

Some specific memories from the journey that will remain at the forefront of my mind are : the initiation on the first day, the non-Rumpff Huts, learning how to keep a bike in motion, the Lake Eucumbene struggle, reaching 1000 miles, the taste of lactate and dried diced pineapple, walking alone and free in Sydney, sitting atop the pagoda at Dunns Swamp, the negative 9 near Walcha, riding into Queensland and arriving home. If you've read most of the journal you'll know that there are so many more that could be on this list that it was hard for me to choose. And that's how an adventure, and indeed life itself, should end up. What's on your list?

Many things I have learnt over the course of my journey. Most I expected and were planned in a sense, while others presented themselves en route or at the conclusion of the trip. Some developed slowly and were skill based (like my photography) while others were more instantaneous and involved attitudes and strategies ('deal with it, accept it and move on'). I desperately hope that the Gryphons words to Alice in Alice's Adventures in Wonderland don't ring true when he says "That's the reason they're called lessons - because they lessen from day to day". This would be a tremendous waste and thus I will reflect upon this journey, and consequently every journey in life, to ensure I retain the lessons learned for the benefit of the next set of experiences. What's the last lesson you forgot?

Most significantly I learnt : the significance and power of short and long term goal setting; how and why opportunity presents itself; that our self-labeled limits are always too low; how less is always more; that perspective and trust is invaluable; how fears are overcome by confronting them with vengeance; that lows make the highs higher; the truth of 'always making it through' and that there's an enormous number of places out there waiting to be discovered. Your most significant recent lesson was?

I could say I was lucky. No one harassed me and I had nothing stolen. I was constantly ahead of schedule and could afford rewarding detours. The problems I encountered didn't postpone or end the journey. I got sick once. I got lost once. I ran into only one car and it was parked. The people I met were generous and positive. I believe these things were a result of acute planning, good problem solving and decision making strategies, an awareness of my thoughts and attitudes, taking due care and the person I am. I didn't need random luck because I made my own. What luck should you be making for yourself?

I never doubted once that I would make it to Brisbane. Not once. Believe what and who you want, but always believe in yourself. There will always be Doubters and there will always be Doers. I encountered both. Believe in yourself and what you are doing, but more importantly - restrain from entering into doubt. Every thought of belief takes you two or more advances ahead, while doubt will drag you back at least one. For me, my thoughts take me five ahead, and my doubts really have to work to drag me back that single one. This attitude and a little bit of arrogance and stubbornness was essential on the ride. What's your ratio?

For me, riding a bike loaded with everything I needed to live through the mountains solo was an adventure. I can tell you now that it was one hell of an adventure to go on. Yours may already be happening,- you just might not realise it's an adventure or name it that. I have returned from my 'wild bike' adventure to start another 'city living' one. Take a step back, look at the crazy and magnificent things you do that you may take for granted, and then go tell someone about it. For it's in the telling that makes you and others realise you're adventuring. That's all I did. Who are you going to tell?

When speaking of the distance I have come I now consider it in terms of personal change and growth, and not physical distance. Kilometres and miles were the easy part, were measurable every day, and were a constant. Change in your being, attitude and outlook come more slowly and creep up like a shortening shadow near noon. Personal growth presents itself in surges at different times - each time had a unique feel and defining moment. To retain and nourish it you just have to be ready to identify it and embrace it before it slips away like a tide. How far have you come from your last checkpoint?

As for finding the meaning of life? I had plenty of time to think about this, but I only found meaning for life (if it's any consolation): Life needs the piecing together of all the big things with the little things in a way that results in achievement, happiness, providing something for others and having no regrets. Additionally, I realised that in life the dreams that come true are those of our own selection, time, effort and persuasion. These two realisations may well become my strongest guiding lights. What's your selection?

Every cent I spent on the journey was worth it, and I reckon I got a bargain for each of them. I can't say if I'll do anything in the same vein again, but I am already planning my next adventure which will go for several years and will contain a few mini adventures. I plan to study for dream #1 (physiotherapy) and travel - both of these overseas. And since I've told you, I now have to do it - this is the accountability of telling. No problem. Again, I'll see you when I get back to Brisbane. What's the status of your 'Dream #1'?

It's all but over, so here's one final observation: Life is all so simple. Treat it as that. Human nature makes us look for difficulties and doubt ourselves. We challenge and try to justify what life gives us until the crisp image that was presented blends into something we can't even focus on. Then we try to build it up again to suit ourselves. Forget the questions and stop seeking for a while - just relax and take in what life and nature presents you with and see what you get. You won't be disappointed.

To R.M.Williams and to those who were wondering, I have an answer - my company was good enough. Thanks for your company via the cyber trail - it's been a special part of the journey.

With these words I sign the journal off, but not the journey.